It tastes like creationism and grits:

“Cool” people think country is hopelessly square. Country singers neither cuss like rappers nor grapple so boldly with “edgy” subjects. “Some messages are clearly not allowable [in country music], like ‘Fuck tha police’ or ‘I got 99 problems and a bitch ain’t one’,” writes Chris Willman in his excellent book “Rednecks and Bluenecks: The Politics of Country Music”. “But then there are messages that aren’t allowable in any other popular-music genre that flourish here, such as: I wish I’d been there when my mama died. I miss my husband in Iraq. Babies and old people rule. If I die, take care of my kids for me.”

Jesus is doing it again, this time, as a Komodo Dragon (PS I heard the Virgin Mary stuck a snake up her puss — unsubstantiated rumor):

LONDON, England (Reuters) — Flora, a pregnant Komodo dragon living in a British zoo, is expecting eight babies in what scientists said on Wednesday could be a Christmas virgin birth.

Flora has never mated, or even mixed, with a male dragon, and fertilized all the eggs herself, a process culminating in parthenogenesis, or virgin birth. Other lizards do this, but scientists only recently found that Komodo dragons do too.

“Nobody in their wildest dreams expected this. But you have a female dragon on her own. She produces a clutch of eggs and those eggs turn out to be fertile. It is nature finding a way,” Kevin Buley of Chester Zoo in England said in an interview.

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For those regular readers who may have noticed this burgeoning young (unofficial?) travel editor providing unparalleled insight into “off-the-road” destinations and situations, we bring another fine piece for those interested in following up on our earlier suggestion of Kenya as a suitable vacation-land.

In fact, it seems that there is a bustling underground economy, or bribery, as those stateside might think to call it. The author explains:

Swahili-speakers can take advantage of another ambiguous term. In Kenya a machine-gun-wielding guard suggested to a terrified Canadian aid worker: “Perhaps you would like to discuss this over tea?” The young Canadian was relieved: the difficulty could be resolved with some chai, which means both “tea” and “bribe”.

some things we all need to realize: Santa is a child molester, and he’ll finger you in the butthole if you are a naughty kid. I am NOT kidding.

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