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Salon has a good/disgusting article today about the CIA’s waterboarding procedure. I always wanted to believe in America as the City on a Hill, an example of freedom and liberty for all the world to emulate. In fact at other points in time, Americans have been courtmartialed for using waterboarding. Back when McCain was semi-liberal Republican, he spoke out vehemently against it, reminding people that we executed Japanese officers for authorizing it. In light of revelations that Bush personally authorized waterboarding, NPR asks would Jesus authorize waterboarding? And how many Hitlers are the ‘accidental’ deaths of tortured Muslims?

So if you haven’t watched AMC’s Mad Men yet, you are missing out on great television. Basically the show is about ad men that get drunk and sexually harass women, it’s great fun. The staff of Double X, aka Slate for Women, decided to drink like the Mad Men and see how that worked. The results were video-taped and are pretty great.

The US of A, bastion of rational thought and scientific reasoning, denied JK Rowling a Medal of Freedom because Bush administration officials believed she “encouraged witchcraft”. While metaphorical witch hunts are par for the course, I didn’t realize that there were people who still believed in shit like that.

Bonus: Jesus says cut here for the win.

As a follow up to Word of the Day’s post, I’d like to throw in my 2 cents and vent a little frustration. I’m really sick of all the anti-American a-holes out there who are willing to sacrifice the ideals of America, everything America stands for, and everything that makes us great so they don’t have to be afraid of the boogy man.

If you don’t like the fact that in America, you should be willing to die as a sacrifice to lady liberty every single day, then maybe you should leave the country and go somewhere safer. The patriots didn’t lay down their lives so that we could be safe at whatever the cost. Patrick Henry didn’t say give me a tall soy latte or give me skim if you’re out of soy. He said give me liberty or give me death. If you aren’t willing to die for your ideals, then what are you willing to die for?

Anyways, two other points: Firstly, I really want to see Samuel L. Jackson as Patrick Henry, saying that famous line punctuated by a forceful SLJ mothafucker. Secondly, this was my favorite comment, props be to Foxwood:

Let’s go surfin’ now
Everybody’s learnin’ how
Do some waterboardin’ with me!

Let’s go surfin’ now
Everybody’s learnin’ how
Do some waterboardin’ with me!

I’m so confused. I know socialism is for faggots, but I just love the Economist. How many third-world countries do we need to invade before we become the #1 democracy, and how many yellow ribbon magnets do I need to buy to make it a reality?

Nothing like sweet, stick molasses on a hot summer day. Speaking of floods, check out sweet photos of Venice under water. I especially like the people pastry shopping in galoshes.

So our soon to be ex-commander-in-chief is apparently drinking heavily, according to Wayne Madsen of the Wayne Madsen Report. I don’t know if it’s true, but I know I have been, pushed in part by these bullshit gas prices. I mean check out NY. Bullshit.

You know what really gets my goat? Peace and non-violence! More heinous beatings for all, I say. That was my slogan when I ran for political office. And I would have become Vicar of Candyland, if it hadn’t been for those attack ads the Gingerbread Man ran against me. So what if I find my constituents delicious? That candy cane told me he was 18!

Speaking of sexy crimes, a woman went undercover to seduce a juror. Bitches is crazy! From now on it’s only digital love for me. Ok, maybe Brian Boitano too.

Gawker does it again! They made me laugh, this time by asking questions of the Real World kids that are ridiculously inappropriate. For example:

4. To the cast: Have you read Joseph O’Neill’s new novel Netherland yet? If so, do you agree with New Yorker critic James Wood’s assessment that it is “perhaps one of the most important post-colonial novels of our time”

Beeteedubs, I saw the Real World cast on Halloween. One of them was dressed like Heath Ledger, with a clearly pro makeup job. It was really well done. That’s the closest I’ve ever been to celebrity, except the time I was eating a Cinnabon outside the Ronald Regan Building when Hillary came out. Yes, to think the then first lady saw me with sticky, goopy hands. An adolescent fantasy come true, I can tell you that much.