Link of the Day

Wanna read the best review of the movie 2 whores, their mom, and their horse? Then check out Lindy West’s review of SATC2, featuring such glorious bits as:

SATC2 takes everything that I hold dear as a woman and as a human—working hard, contributing to society, not being an entitled cunt like it’s my job—and rapes it to death with a stiletto that costs more than my car. It is 146 minutes long, which means that I entered the theater in the bloom of youth and emerged with a family of field mice living in my long, white mustache. This is an entirely inappropriate length for what is essentially a home video of gay men playing with giant Barbie dolls…

At sexism’s funeral (which takes place in a mysterious, incense-shrouded chamber of international sisterhood), the women of Abu Dhabi remove their black robes and veils to reveal—this is not a joke—the same hideous, disposable, criminally expensive shreds of cloth and feathers that hang from Carrie et al.’s emaciated goblin shoulders. Muslim women: Under those craaaaaaay-zy robes, they’re just as vapid and obsessed with physical beauty and meaningless material concerns as us! Feminism! Fuck yeah!

With the pièce de résistance at the conclusion: “If this is what modern womanhood means, then just fucking veil me and sew up all my holes. Good night.” Sigh, god bless you Lindy West.

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It is not hyperbole when I say Fake Science is the greatest website of all time. First off, look at this:

Do you see how funny that is? That is art. It is a site of nothing but pure, emancipated uber-truthiness, spewing its hobgoblins of thought and mystery into your unsuspecting eyes. Go to that site, and go there often, or I will personally track down your IP address and sell your dog to a Chinese restaurant.

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It’s time for PBH to get back to what it does best: Hating on mother fuckers. Target 1 is Tyler Cowen, the vapid “Marginal Revolution” blogger who’s primary objective in life is to compete with Malcolm Gladwell and Thomas Friedman for the coveted ‘enamored with insipid and insignificant observations’ demographic. Witness his post on why Haiti is so poor:

1. Haiti cut its colonial ties too early, rebelling against the French in the early 19th century and achieving complete independence. Guadaloupe and Martinique are still riding the gravy train and French aid is a huge chunk of their GDP.

2. Haiti was a French colony in the first place and French colonies do less well.

5. Hegel was correct that the “voodoo religion,” with its intransitive power relations among the gods, was prone to producing political intransitivity as well. (Isn’t that a startling insight for a guy who didn’t travel the broader world much?)

6. For reasons peculiar to the history of the slave trade, Haitian slaves came from many different parts of Africa and thus Haitian internal culture has long had lower levels of cohesion and cooperation.

7. Haiti has higher than average levels of polygamy

Now, this wouldn’t be a big deal, except for the fact Cowen is an Economics professor. Yes, someone who teaches Economics for a living listed “polygamy” and “voodoo religion” as a reason for Haiti’s underdevelopment. And who says Economics is a respected intellectual field?

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In the, “I think we need a new PR department”, the BBC reports that BeautifulPeople.com cut 5,000 people from its site for putting on weight during the holidays. Or, as the caustic spokesmen explained,

“Letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model and the very concept for which BeautifulPeople.com was founded.”

Apparently BeautifulPeople is the Sizzlers of the internet: susceptible to the unending appetite of the overweight.

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From the Eggplant Post comes some quality Thomas Friedman mockery:

“Imagine a world where everyone is a sea lion, and then imagine that world if the only way sea lions can get around is on a bicycle. You see where we are headed? Sea lions don’t have feet, so we cant peddle the bicycles. If we don’t solve this smokiness problem, we are all in for a tough bike ride.” Friedman confirmed his observations of the world during a late dinner on the 2nd floor of the Hilton: “Why does everyone here look Chinese?” he asked himself. “I thought I was in Dubai.”

Read the whole damn thing. If you are anything like me, it will make your angry heart flutter.

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Best review ever:

There are many kinds of truth. There are truths based on facts, truths based on faith, and truths based on something that sounds as if it should be true (truthiness). Then there’s the kind of truth we find in Sarah’s book: stories and concepts that become truths simply because she states them. She’s a lot like our Lord and Savior, Glen Beck, in that respect.

Sometimes, she states truths that would be considered ludicrous if uttered by someone else. Her claim that the McCain campaign forced her to spend $150,000 in RNC funds to dress her family in designer clothes is one example of that. Although it might be easier to believe that she acted like a trailer park Zsa Zsa who’d found a credit card left behind at a possum feed, she blames McCain staffers. That’s good enough for us, because we have faith; we want to believe her truths.

But the book isn’t perfect. As much as I enjoyed the few short paragraphs in which Mrs Palin laid out her policy objectives, she could have condensed it all into one sentence: “I’m going to grab an Oxo Good Grips Stainless Serving Spatula and go all mavericky on your non-white, non-Christian and non-heterosexual butts.”

The book also fails to expose Mrs. Palin’s intellectual brilliance and keen grasp of foreign policy issues. Why wasn’t the text of her recent speech in Hong Kong included? Although it remains secret, it’s rumored that she viciously rebuked the Vietcong king for his assault on the Empire State Building. That’s a speech we’ve been waiting for nearly 75 years to hear. It’s big news and should have been included.

As you read other reviews of this book, please remember that Mrs. Palin has many enemies who are eager to pan her work. The Palin family’s most potent nemesis, Levi’s johnston, is no doubt fully erect and ready to spew globs of misfortune upon them for a third time. And reason-adoring intellectuals are certain to point out that an interview on Good Morning Topeka doesn’t qualify as a policy summit in the Far East.

But a few bad reviews won’t stop her. She’s seen much worse from her kitchen window. It can’t be pleasant to gaze upon Antichristograd every morning as you brew your coffee.

My review isn’t complete, but I think I’ll quit anyway, because writing reviews, like governing, is just too darned hard to finish.

[via PBH2 & PBH3]

See Also: Adam Bellow’s Fact-Checking, Ctd, Palin, like, totally pwn3d by Canadian comedian or something, Sarah Palin “bus tour” a hoax, more like “private jet tour”, Going Rogue: An American Life by Sarah Palin, Palin Populism Is Just Another Kind Of Elitism, Scariest Sarah Palin Moment Ever?, David Solway: Redeeming Sarah, Palin Throws Self Under Bus, Dems Hoping To Raise Cash Off Success Of Sarah Palin’s Going Rogue, Formatting The Palin Effect, Lady GaGa’s LaLa Land, Ctd, Palin Quits……………………………………Again, and Glenn Beck on Sarah Palin, “Get back in the Kitchen.”.

Technorati Tags: sarah palin, sara palin, going rogue, review of going rogue, levi johnston, sarah palin going rogue, sarah palin book, review, book review, hilarious, funny, amazon, best review on amazon

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[via The Onion]

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