{"id":1704,"date":"2008-02-01T09:48:51","date_gmt":"2008-02-01T14:48:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/call-me-jesse\/02\/01\/hes-our-man\/"},"modified":"2008-02-01T09:48:51","modified_gmt":"2008-02-01T14:48:51","slug":"hes-our-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/call-me-jesse\/02\/01\/hes-our-man\/","title":{"rendered":"He’s Our Man"},"content":{"rendered":"

The huddled masses have been awaiting my political endorsement as if it were Groundhog’s day and my announcement should bring either extended famine or gracious reprieve. Be anxious no longer for my word is upon you. I gladly endorse the only democratic candidate who is both qualified and electable: obviously John Edwards is our man…. whats that? he already dropped out? Alas, my timing isn’t what it used to be. Well, I always thought he’d make a good Vice President as well…. whats that? he said VP doesn’t interest him? Buckle up then folks, its gonna be a bumpy ride. Plenty of polarized politics to go around for everyone. Don’t expect any middle ground; these candidates are prepared to swing far and wide if thats what it takes to distinguish themselves. Perhaps that was Edward’s downfall; he was just too likable, too much a man of the people. Reminding the middle class that exploitative elitists pose more threat to their way of life than terrorists just didn’t strike enough fear into the populace. As if America needs another decade or two of foreign turmoil before our domestic shortcomings become apparent. America is no stranger to electing the aged; perhaps Edwards will have the courage to run again by 2016. We should be so lucky.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The huddled masses have been awaiting my political endorsement as if it were Groundhog’s day and my announcement should bring either extended famine or gracious reprieve. Be anxious no longer for my word is upon you. I gladly endorse the only democratic candidate who is both qualified and electable: obviously John Edwards is our man…. 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