{"id":190,"date":"2005-12-13T15:48:20","date_gmt":"2005-12-13T19:48:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/index.html"},"modified":"2012-12-26T20:56:31","modified_gmt":"2012-12-27T01:56:31","slug":"oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/","title":{"rendered":"oh oh I found my christmas present!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dearest Mommy,<\/p>\n

If there is one thing I’ve ever wanted out of the numerous gifts this world could give me — love, education, hope — there is one thing I’ve always wanted. It is a Bill O’Reilly jigsaw puzzle.<\/a><\/p>\n

Oh how fun it would be to complete the puzzle! And if any pieces didn’t fit in the way I liked, I would call them homosexual and far left and then smash them into their place! Take that you lefty loonies!!!<\/p>\n

Sincerely yours,
\nAlec<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dearest Mommy, If there is one thing I’ve ever wanted out of the numerous gifts this world could give me — love, education, hope — there is one thing I’ve always wanted. It is a Bill O’Reilly jigsaw puzzle. Oh how fun it would be to complete the puzzle! And if any pieces didn’t fit […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[259],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\noh oh I found my christmas present! - Prose Before Hos<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dearest Mommy, If there is one thing I've ever wanted out of the numerous gifts this world could give me -- love, education, hope -- there is one thing\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"oh oh I found my christmas present! - Prose Before Hos\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Dearest Mommy, If there is one thing I've ever wanted out of the numerous gifts this world could give me -- love, education, hope -- there is one thing\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Prose Before Hos\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2005-12-13T19:48:20+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-12-27T01:56:31+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"alec\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@pbhnetwork\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@pbhnetwork\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"alec\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/alec\/12\/13\/oh-oh-i-found-my-christmas-present\/\",\"name\":\"oh oh I found my christmas present! 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