{"id":3403,"date":"2009-04-05T18:09:41","date_gmt":"2009-04-05T23:09:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/?p=3403"},"modified":"2009-04-06T07:27:09","modified_gmt":"2009-04-06T12:27:09","slug":"fuck-we-missed-april-fools-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/word-of-the-day\/04\/05\/fuck-we-missed-april-fools-day\/","title":{"rendered":"Fuck! We missed April Fools Day!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Damnit all. We completely missed April Fool&#8217;s at ProseBeforeHos. I had the following ideas that didn&#8217;t get implemented:<\/p>\n<p>1) Turn PBH into Pros Be For eHos &#8212; an online support forum and how-to-guide for professional athletes, by professional athletes. Articles would include:<\/p>\n<ul>Jason Kidds Guide To Beating Your Wife &#8212; Hi, my names Jason Kidd. You may know me best as the point guard for the Dallas Mavericks, world renowned for dishing out breathtaking passes. But I also love dishing out abuse to women who I feel intimate with.  With my helpful guide, you&#8217;ll learn the ancient tricks of rug burns, throwing boiling water, and how to appropriately yell at your children as they helplessly watch you toss your loved ones around.<\/ul>\n<ul>Kobe Bryants How-To Rape White Women<\/ul>\n<ul>Travis Henry and Shawn Kemp team up to teach you, the over-paid and under-educated professional athlete, how to raw-dog as many females as possible to ensure your genetics are spread throughout the population like a dandelion in the breeze.<\/ul>\n<p>2) Turn PBH into an online site that celebrates battering your man.<\/p>\n<p>3) Turn PBH into a full time Sarah Palin stalker site, complete with dreamed up expressions of love and seduction with the female governor.<\/p>\n<p>Well, we fucked it up good this year, but we&#8217;ll be back next year. To forget it again. I promise.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Damnit all. We completely missed April Fool&#8217;s at ProseBeforeHos. I had the following ideas that didn&#8217;t get implemented: 1) Turn PBH into Pros Be For eHos &#8212; an online support forum and how-to-guide for professional athletes, by professional athletes. Articles would include: Jason Kidds Guide To Beating Your Wife &#8212; Hi, my names Jason Kidd. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Fuck! We missed April Fools Day! - Prose Before Hos<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Damnit all. We completely missed April Fool&#039;s at ProseBeforeHos. I had the following ideas that didn&#039;t get implemented: 1) Turn PBH into Pros Be For eHos\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/word-of-the-day\/04\/05\/fuck-we-missed-april-fools-day\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Fuck! We missed April Fools Day! - Prose Before Hos\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Damnit all. We completely missed April Fool&#039;s at ProseBeforeHos. 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