A Haiku About These Sorts of People (victims of Yuppie Death March):

Jagerbombs

Suburban Girls
In Short Skirts, Free Sex
For Strong Drinks

I don’t even have the energy to take a cheap shot. But a FOX NEWS ANCHOR, Tony Snow, is going to be the White House Press Secretary following the departure of Scott McClellan. I guess lubricating the Republican War Machine with delicious Astro-oil wasn’t fun enough in the private sector — time to take this propoganda machine to the MAN in the WHITE HOUSE! (Ok, I lied about the cheap shot). Last cheap shot: Wasn’t the job of Conservative Advocacy & Truth Denial contracted out to Fox News (insert swastika here) in the first place?

From Gawker:

His Fox News colleague Juan Williams, meantime, remains in negotiations to become Bush’s black press secretary.

Text of Clooney’s speech: “Wow. Wow. All right, so I’m not winning director. It’s the funny thing about winning an Academy Award, it will always be synonymous with your name from here on in. It will be Oscar winner, George Clooney. Sexiest Man Alive, 1997. Batman, died today in a freak accident at a — Listen, I don’t quite know how you compare art. You look at these performances this year, of these actors and unless we all did the same role, everybody put on a bat suit, and we’ll all try that. Unless we all did the same role, I don’t know how you compare it. They are stellar performances and wonderful work, and I’m honored, truly honored to be up here. And finally, I would say that, you know, we are a little bit out of touch in Hollywood every once in a while. I think it’s probably a good thing. We’re the ones who talk about AIDS when it was just being whispered, and we talked about civil rights when it wasn’t really popular. And we, you know, we bring up subjects. This Academy, this group of people gave Hattie McDaniel an Oscar in 1939 when blacks were still sitting in the backs of theaters. I’m proud to be a part of this Academy. Proud to be part of this community, and proud to be out of touch. And I thank you so much for this.”

Twenty years ago, bureaucracy inefficiency and nuclear energy collided in the Soviet Union:

As the 20th anniversary of Chernobyl approaches in Belarus, and the opposition forces plan a final protest march on April 26 in the aftermath of the presidential elections, there is no sign that the country has come close to overcoming the profound health, social, and environmental problems caused by the 1986 nuclear accident.

The issue has been clouded by two factors. First, there is the politicization of the Chernobyl event as a symbol of the confrontation between the president and the opposition, particularly the united democratic forces behind candidate Alexander Milinkevich. Second, there has been a rather unseemly international dispute as to the health effects of Chernobyl, and particularly the long-term mortality rates from radiation-induced cancers.

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