Prose Before Hos

Barack Obama–UNCENSORED

The commander-in-chief lets his hair down and drops some f-bombs into his otherwise diplomatic diction. We like.

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What We Think Obama Does Vs. What He Actually Does

What President Does

Add an anvil to the first frame to represent Congress, and you’ve got yourself an accurate assessment of the modern presidency.

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Learn To Speak Benghazi!

The vocabulary is simple: there’s only one word, and it may be used to explain everything from why your waiter served you mashed potatoes instead of a baked potato (like you had so politely ordered), to why Antarctic ice sheets have made like Britney Spears and totally cracked. Put plainly, fluency in Benghazi just makes life a whole lot more comprehensible. So simplify your life. Learn Benghazi today.

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Don’t Look Now: Benghazilla Is Back

Benghazilla

A fraction of a drop of water in the deep well of American errors abroad, the massively minuscule Benghazilla monster is back and is more of a national security threat than ever.

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A Kentucky Death Match

Kentucky Death Match

The Article: Kentucky Death Match by Mark Binelli in The Rolling Stone.

The Text: very March, across the commonwealth of Kentucky, the Republican Party throws a series of Lincoln-Reagan fundraising dinners. Candidates for state and federal office are expected to attend, hobnob, serve themselves from a hot buffet, perhaps enjoy an alcoholic beverage (depending on the wetness or dryness of the particular county), certainly remain standing after “The Star-Spangled Banner” for a rendition of “My Old Kentucky Home” (which even non-Kentuckians agree to be hands down the greatest of state songs) and, of course, solemnly bow their heads while a local reverend offers a blessing. At the Lincoln-Reagan dinner held this year in Murray, in southwestern Kentucky, the reverend took note of daylight saving time and wondered, “Maybe we should think of national savings time? Father, help us save this nation!”

The most Midwestern of the Southern states, Kentucky ranks near the top of the nation in drug-overdose deaths and income inequality. Since Bill Clinton left office, Kentucky has been consistently red when it comes to presidential elections, and the long, slow death of the coal industry, accelerated in recent years by competition from cheap natural gas and regulatory threats from the Obama administration, has made the political landscape only more treacherous for liberals. Yet the state’s most popular elected official, Gov. Steve Beshear, is a Democrat who cannily figured out a way to design one of the most successful state health exchanges in the nation, despite the toxicity of President Barack Obama and the Affordable Care Act in Kentucky. (Beshear is the only Southern governor who did not reject the Obama­care Medicaid expansion.)

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