TV rots your brain, commercials rot your soul

I, too must confess my weakness for vapid reality television programming–my guiltiest pleasure being Laguna Beach. However, equally entertaining–to me, at least–are the commercials that fill the gaps between the footage of those kids being rich and attractive together. My favorite is the one for Valtrex, which features an attractive, soft-voiced woman who posits: “Dealing with genital herpes can be a real hassle.” I crack up every time. A hassle is mislaying your keys or picking the wrong line in the supermarket checkout. An incurable STD, the symptoms of which include painful burning and oozing pustules–that’s a fucking disaster! Why are the people in these commercials always hiking or running on a beach? For accuracy’s sake, shouldn’t they been shown on their knees in the stall of some gas station bathroom? I guess maybe that wouldn’t make for such a good ad.