A New Kind of Love (or hate)

YOU SELFISH PIG you already had their scripts lying around:

YOU NEVER FORGOT WHO WAS PURE AND BEST OF ALL. YOU ATE ALL THOSE FILTHY PUSSIES WITH NO SOUL, YOU MAKE ME SICK< YOU ARE FILTH AND HOPE YOU DIE FROM ALL YOUR GOOD TIMES OUT WITH THESE WORTLESS HALFASSERS< GO FUCK YOURSELF BRIDGET< YOU DONT DESERVR MY BODY! YOU ARE A PIG, YOU MAKE LOVE WITH THE AVERAGE STINKIN BITCHES NOT BE I HAVE GOTTON LUCKY> I HOPE YOUR LIVER GOES OUT FILTHY DYKE PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* this is in or around alchoholic trash

I hope they buy it

I hope my friends buy it — I tell them it was dark, I was drunk, and there was a very powerful fog machine. But I saw you again — we talked about your insecurities, and we talked about mine. We talked about mine actually, for the whole night. And you listened.

Then we kissed, and since that moment, I haven’t forgotten about the feelings that even a pathetic soul like me can experience. I hope you pity me enough to remember too.

What have you done with my heart?

D.N.

What have you done with my heart? You walked away that night and I’ve been dying ever since. Where do you keep it? Do you take care of it? Did you just stash it somewhere? Toss it in the bushes? Did you stick it under a bench somewhere? I’d ask for it back – but it doesn’t work that way. I lost it to you. The first time I saw you, I thought I hope he is single. I hope he is not gay. I hope he is not too young. I hope he feels it too.

You seemed to? I was a little scared and very surprised to loose my heart so soon. Why didn’t we get to know each other better? Where is your heart- do you have one still? I wish I had yours. If I had it I’d take good care of it. I loved you so quickly and effortlessly. I think you are beautiful and I ache for you. My body yearns for you. I want to touch your face, your neck, your stomach, your hips. I know I love you. I’m so sad. I miss you. Someday maybe I’ll find my heart again, and soothe it, whisper to it, heal it. Maybe I will be o.k.

E.S.

actions

actions speak louder than words. that’s the old saying. but when i find you in my own god damn bed knee-deep with my cousin, playing hide the salami, it does NOT make for a successful relationship. and this the day after you gave me a promise ring?

oh, and by the way, i STILL have your spongebob squarepants DVD’s. my cousin may be single and desparate, but she is still 39 and won’t get your impish, childish humor. i hope you rot.

ps. can i have my rachael ray cookbook back?

where did you go? m4m

you: short, patchy faced looking adolescent, quietly seeking out male attention

me: slighty unattractive middle aged male

us: suburban bar in northern virginia, saturday night

at first i wondered why you weren’t talking to any girls and had surrounded yourself with the same sex the whole night. but then i figured out you were looking for the touch of someone like yourself. our eyes met and we instantly talked, but you left as quick as you came. where are you? i look forward to more conversations about alligators and reasonable prices.