The pope has an endorsement to make.

From now on I am a full and total supporter of Stephen Colbert running for the democratic and republican nomination for President of the United States in South Carolina. Mr. Colbert has a platform that all Americans can get behind.

1. He is the favored son of South Carolina

2. He is against the “Homosexual Agenda”

3. He is against Chinese shrimp imports and their effect on the South Carolina shrimp industry

4. He is for a corporate sponsor, preferably a salty snack food

5. He is running to get one delegate cast in his name

You can see the announcement here. I will be following Mr. Colbert’s run for office, and he has earned my full support and endorsement.

THE POPE HAS A FAVORED SON AS WELL!

Your favorite pope is here once again laying it down hard and in your face with the truth of it all. I spend my days split between running for more than 5% of the G.O.P. primary vote and reading all the national news worth reading. Now why would your Pope go and do that for you? The answer is obvious…I read the news so you don’t have to, then you come here and read what I think is important.

It’s an amazing system isn’t it…

Blackwater USA is finally out of Iraq for shooting the shit out of too many civilians; this time the Iraqi government stood the fuck up. The 9/11 truthies need to get their shiny aluminum thinkin’ caps on cause here’s another political tie-in for your conspiracy puzzle. While the truthies get their story, greens are denied this week in California versus Big Auto with a major wimp out citing “it’s just too complicated for the courts”. After six years of threats and bluster about terror, terrorism, and terroristical tendencies President Bush threatens to veto a bill that actually addresses the impacts of terror. That wilily president…if you look one way, he moves another. He’s like a cheetah, a sexy drunk cheetah. ACLU is out there protecting the rights of sex crazed perverts. Funny how republicans only care about civil rights when it helps them. Human decency seems to only be a facet of bleeding heart liberals, but then again…Who the hell needs Madonna discussing Middle Eastern Peace as a photo op? This dried up wrinkled old cum dumpster only moved to England because America got tired of her saggy ass breasts and fake accent. And in other news no one cares about, a soldier takes a stand against a dangerous vaccine, and is screwed for it. And our affair with OJ gets a shot of love juice.

My friends of friends, expect more terror, bombs, killings, erosions of civil liberties, and at least one celebrity death. President Bush will continue to insist he is “more gooder” while everyone else is “more badder”. And don’t ever forget, if you’re not scared shitless every day of islamofacisimadeupaword, you’re unamerican.

Here’s your Pope signing off, and sending out.

See you on the trail to 2008.

Fuck The Troops.

The Pope knoweth all.