A New Pillar Of American Literature: Mike The Situation
I must confess: I cheated.
I vowed to spend last Saturday as The Situation. To live 24 hours vicariously GTL’ing it up as the six-packed, shameless star of the Jersey Shore. Now, I had my limitations. New York City in early November, for starters. There were the issues of Gym and Tan. My gym is uptown at school and I don’t do tanning beds, so I just ran to Brooklyn Bridge and back. The Jersey Shore falsely glamorizes the Laundry process. I experienced no T-shirt time chants when I donned my GTL shirt. Only confused looks.
The chatty Asian lady at the corner deli was speechless when I ordered 3 chicken parms and a protein shake in lieu of my usual lunch order. You also have no idea how long it takes to speak with Delta Airlines customer service when you have to say your middle name is The Situation. And don’t let Ronnie fool you. The fist-pump proved to be an ineffective dance move at an Italian party later that evening.
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