October 15th is Blog Action Day, where bloggers around the globe are attempting to unite and raise awareness of Global Warming this one day.
How effective will this be? Not sure, that’s a ton of computers that will all be greedily sucking electricity on one day.
Here are some things that PBH thinks you need to do to help reduce your greenhouse emissions:
1. Suicide. If you’re dead you’re not using any resources.
2. Slavery. If you’ve got a servant running around everywhere for you you’re not driving that gas guzzling SUV. And if you can afford a Hummer you can afford a slave, don’t tell us otherwise.
3. Blow up a power plant. Take the fight to them. We don’t need their dirty, blood covered electricity. Blow those coal, nuclear, and natural gas plants up. Tell the power companies we mean business. Remember; terrorism does work.
4. Go homeless. If you don’t have a house you can’t be using that much electricity.
5. Steal more. Thievery doesn’t place a record on product sales therefore you get what you want and manufacturers never see the need to increase product output.
6. Slap an asshole. See someone being wasteful, opulent, or just a downright dirty republican polluter? Beat the shit out of them. Remember, polluters aren’t like you and me, they only understand pain and fear.
7. Stop reading newspapers. Sure it’s news, but you killed a carbon sequestering tree to get it. Best to live in ignorance.
8. Eat more meat. The more cows we kill, the sooner we get rid of them and their ozone killing farts.
9. Drink beer, not soda. Beer is natural, it’s water and grains. Show beverage producers you’re through with heavily processed pollution filled liquid drugs that rot your mind and stomach. Drop the caffeine and soda-pop. Drink the beer.
10. Stop caring. Remember, the more you care, the more you do. The more you do, the more pollution you create. You need to believe in America first, and that belief is that smarter and more capable people will take care of the problem for you. Only you can make it worse, so stay out of the way.
Happy Blog Action Day and take our environmental advice to heart!