I Finally Figured Out What’s Wrong With Me :(

Witzelsucht, from the German witzeln, meaning to joke or wisecrack and sucht meaning addiction or yearning, is a set of rare neurological symptoms characterized by the patient’s uncontrollable tendency to pun, tell inappropriate jokes and pointless or irrelevant stories at inconvenient moments. The patient nevertheless finds these utterances intensely amusing. It is associated with small lesions of the orbitofrontal cortex.

It is distinguished from pathological laughing by virtue of congruent affective experience and expression, and an admixture of irritability and mirth. It is most commonly seen in patients with frontal lobe disease or injury, particularly right frontal lobe tumors or trauma.

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Welcome To Barack Obama’s Race-Free America

It looks like another beer summit needs to take place, where centuries of racial injustice will be cured by a 20 minute conversation with the Tiger Woods of politics:

A prominent Columbia architecture professor punched a female university employee in the face at a Harlem bar during a heated argument about race relations, cops said yesterday…

The professor, who is black, had been engaged in a fiery discussion about “white privilege” with Davis, who is white, and another male regular, who is also white, Friday night at 10:30 when fists started flying, patrons said.

McIntyre, who is known as “Mac” at the bar, shoved Davis, and when the other patron and a bar employee tried to break it up, the prof slugged Davis in the face, witnesses said.

Also, this is what ‘Mac’ looks like (and if I could photo shop, it would say ‘BARACK OBAMA’D!!!’):

barack obama'd!!!

[via NYPost]

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Government By The Rich, For The Rich

Surprise surprise ladies and gentleman: Politico reports that of the 535 members of Congress, 237 are millionaires. That’s 45%. Forty-fucking-five percent, compared to only 1% of Americans overall. While you were busy stuffing your face with corn fructose byproducts, they were busy stuffing their pockets with bribes. And just remember children: democracy works.

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Reasons I Fucking Hate Keith Olbermann

Seeing as my I fucking hate Keith Olbermann post is the number 1 google search result for… I fucking hate Keith Olbermann, I feel that it is my duty to enumerate the reasons why I fucking hate Keith Olbermann:

#1 He is an overpaid, wanna-be progressive in the mold of the typical over-educated, under-critical New England Liberal. This can be summed up as “I want a reconfiguration of the American socio-economic landscape, as long as it doesn’t impact my privilege, challenge my own lifestyles and perspective, or induce a structural shift in the inequalities in American society that I benefit from.” These are also the same people that think Barack Obama is ‘change’.

#2 He thinks he is a real journalist. Everyday of his life seems to be a painful exercise in thinking he’s Edward Murrow. Bad news buddy, you’re the centrist version of a Fox News commentator, just spewing vitriol into the magic shiny box every night.

#3 He wins the award for douchiest quote ever, “I’m not a liberal, I’m an American.”

#4 He is a direct descendant of Pol Pot.

There you have it. All the reasons I fucking hate Keith Olbermann.

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A One… A Two… A Three

As if one PBH wasn’t bad enough (or two), there is now a third PBH on Tumblr. We will be diluting our content to the point of non-existence and you will like it!

Also, WellPlacedPottery is back up, albeit in need of some serious alterations and updates.

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