Courtesy of Girl Farts (which I can only assume is a site run by an Asian man whose fetish is to stick his nose into a women’s buttcrack after a hearty meal of barbecue and semen), it’s been reported that “rape victims in Missouri are billed for their rape kits“. Now, you see, some people may misconstrue this as some horrible measure in a podunk, antiquated state. But in reality, this is a continuation of the Thomas Jefferson business policies (TJ biz-nass for all you ebonics linguists), for it is the secret clause in the US Constitution that reads “Thou shalt do ladies against thy will, and when thee pregnancy emerges, they shalt be the one to pay for it. When thy is confronted with said charges, please ignorance, heavily and mightily, and when unsurmountable evidence falls out of your favor, publicly state “She asked for it”. Thus, thou shalt be ridden of thy burden”. America people, learn to love it.